Living With High-Functioning Anxiety in Erie, PA: How Therapy Can Support the Struggles You Hide So Well
To the outside world, you’ve got it all together. People say that you’re dependable, hard-working, maybe even a leader. But on the inside, you’re in a constant state of worry. You’re exhausted because your mind can’t seem to shut off. This is the hidden struggle of high-functioning anxiety.
High-functioning anxiety is often misunderstood or overlooked because the person experiencing it may seem to have it all figured out. It may appear to the outside observer that you’ve got a great job, a good group of friends, and are loving life. However, it’s this appearance of “success” that makes it that much harder to recognize how deep into the anxiety spiral you’ve fallen.
We’re here to validate how hard this truly is for you - and to show you how anxiety therapy in Erie, PA, can assist you in living and thriving - not just “getting through the day”.
The Mask of High-Functioning Anxiety
The nature of high-functioning anxiety fits uncomfortably well with our Protestant-work-ethic, capitalist society - to the outside, it looks like you’re just a dedicated, driven person. However, the experiences you have are draining, rather than energizing - leaving you feeling like a shell of yourself, giving everything to others.
Perfectionism and People Pleasing
Individuals with anxiety, especially those with high-functioning anxiety, tend to be perfectionists and people pleasers more often than the general population. You might be a perfectionistic people pleaser if:
You find yourself agreeing to yet another project at work when your desk is already overflowing.
You agree to go out with friends when all you want to do is cozy up on the couch with a good movie or book and your favorite furry friend.
You smile and nod as your coworker unleashes a tirade about the latest political event - even though you’d love nothing more than to tell them to shove off and walk away.
You don’t mention how badly your coffee order was messed up and just drink it anyway, grimacing at how bad it is the whole time.
You can’t stop worrying about what other people think about you - whether you realize it or not.
The thought of disappointing people feels crippling - maybe even like that isn’t an option for you at all!
Over-Planning and Over-Preparing
When you have anxiety, you feel a strong urge to make sure every aspect of your life is controlled - whether it’s possible to control or not. You’re likely struggling with over-preparing if:
Your schedule is tight - there’s no room to breathe, let alone think.
You can’t take a vacation without meticulously planning and creating an itinerary.
If people suggest “winging it”, you feel your eye start to twitch.
You get to the airport 5 hours before your flight, make sure your gate exists, and get in your seat 2 hours before your flight, just in case boarding happens early (even though you know it never does).
The idea of not having control over your day feels terrifying.
Experiencing a Near-Constant State of Urgency
Anxiety leads you to feel like there’s never enough time - even if you’re running ahead of schedule, or getting things done at a good pace. This often looks like:
Feeling generally frantic - on edge, shaky, like you’ve just downed a whole pot of coffee.
Difficulty focusing - you’re so worried about getting everything done that you can’t seem to settle down enough to tackle one thing at a time.
Quality of work going down - in your rush to get things done, you get sloppy, making mistakes that feel stupid or silly.
Unable to relax - the idea of sitting down with your partner to enjoy a movie night feels like a waste of time, as there’s entirely too much on your mind.
The “I’m Fine” Facade
When you have anxiety, the idea of asking for help feels terrifying. Other people might see you as “weak” or “incapable” - and that’s absolutely something that you can’t tolerate. This often looks like:
Refusing to give up a project when your boss can clearly see that you’re drowning.
Telling your partner to go relax, you can handle the house cleaning - but secretly wishing they wouldn’t listen to you.
Realizing you have too much on your plate, but listening to your mind telling you “that’s just how life goes”, gritting your teeth and pushing through.
Giving up your own self-care to get things done - sleeping less, skipping meals, or missing gatherings with loved ones, just to name a few.
Calm and Capable on the Outside - Chaotic Inside
High-functioning anxiety gets missed most often because of this issue - that on the outside, you seem calm, cool, and collected. On the inside, you feel like there’s a mental tornado ripping everything to shreds. This might be you if:
When you share that you’re thinking about going to therapy, everyone you talk to says, “What would you need therapy for? You’re fine!”
You’re always the go-to person when shit hits the fan, and you really wish someone else would take it on.
You get high accolades at work for being reliable and always having your head on straight, even though it feels like you’re drowning.
You are exhausted at the end of every day - even when it seems like not much has happened to exhaust you.
Why “Pushing Through” Isn’t Sustainable
You may find yourself reading the above and saying, “well, that’s just life - just gotta push through it!” That, dear reader, is 100% not sustainable in the long run. (Trust us - this is what we do.) When you try to push through anxiety and just make do with what you have, many things can happen that are at best uncomfortable, at worst, potentially life crippling:
Mental Burnout
You can start to feel mentally drained, flat, and like there’s no substance to you, which often leads to depression and difficulty motivating yourself to take care of your mind, body, and wellness.
Physical Burnout
Sleep starts becoming a luxury - or, it becomes the only thing you can seem to get yourself to do. You stop eating regularly, or your stomach seems bottomless. Among many other things, your body just stops behaving the way you’re used to - and that can really mess with your head.
Problems in Your Relationships
When you’re struggling with your anxiety, you’re not yourself - which means that your relationships are based on a different version of you than is truly you. When you wear a mask, your relationships aren’t authentic - people who know the real you might worry that something is wrong. This can lead to a damaging cycle where you assure them you’re fine, and they start to pull away because they can sense something is wrong.
The Loss of You
All of these things can lead to you feeling unlike yourself. You lose touch with who you truly are - what motivates you, what you love, and what you truly want, because you’re so worried about other people’s views and expectations of you. It can truly feel as though you don’t have a self any longer, and you may wonder who “you” really are after all.
Anxiety Therapy in Erie, PA: Your Safe Space to Take Off the Mask
Coming to therapy allows you to have someone in your life who isn’t looking for your mask. Your anxiety therapist won’t judge you and will encourage you to be fully yourself. You won’t feel pressured to be “on”, and can let the heavy weight you’ve been carrying fall off your shoulders.
Learning to Have Better Boundaries
Your therapist will help you to identify how your high-functioning anxiety has been causing issues in your relationships, and how to start to make changes. Your therapist can help you learn and practice saying “no” so that you can prioritize your own well-being again!
Challenging Your Inner Perfectionist
In anxiety therapy, you can explore where your need to be perfect comes from, and how you can meet that need in a way that fits better with your life and who you are. Your therapist can help you to develop self-compassion, so that you can hold yourself gently when you’re struggling.
Reconnecting with your Authentic Self
The therapeutic process focuses on helping you to isolate what parts of yourself are valuable, meaningful, or desirable to you - and which parts aren’t. This can be one of the most challenging things for folx with high-functioning anxiety to do on their own, since anxiety bakes itself into our values and makes it seem like serving others is who we are. Your therapist can help you tease your values out and rediscover what brings you joy and meaning, separate from the expectations you’ve created for yourself.
Conclusion from an Anxiety Therapist in Erie, PA
High-functioning anxiety is a real and exhausting struggle, and you don’t have to go through it alone. Even though success is valuable in today’s society, your peace is priceless, and you deserve a life that leaves you feeling fulfilled and at ease.
If you’re ready to take off your mask and find true peace, reach out to us at Metamorphosis Counseling today. You deserve support for the struggles you’ve hidden so well.
Find Support for High-Functioning Anxiety with Anxiety Therapy in Erie, PA
If you’ve become skilled at hiding your anxiety behind achievement, busyness, or a smile, you don’t have to keep carrying it all on your own. At Metamorphosis Counseling, our caring team offers anxiety therapy in Erie, PA, designed to help you manage the pressure, quiet the constant self-doubt, and find healthier ways to cope. Together, we’ll create space for you to feel supported and understood—without judgment or expectation.
Here’s how to get started working with our team:
Call 814-273-6270 or fill out our contact form to connect with our team.
Schedule your first anxiety therapy session in Erie, PA, with a compassionate, experienced counselor.
Begin your journey toward peace and clarity, with steady support every step of the way.
More Counseling Services at Metamorphosis Counseling in Erie, PA
Along with anxiety therapy in Erie, PA, we provide a range of supportive options to meet diverse needs. Our therapists offer trauma counseling to help clients process and heal from difficult experiences, child and teen therapy to foster emotional growth and resilience, and online therapy for those who value the comfort and convenience of meeting virtually from home.
